Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Eating Colors for Health


Monday, August 19, 2013

5 Things to Stop Saying to Your Kids During Emotional Moments (and What to Say Instead)

Researches in child psychology show that some of the most commonly used and seemingly positive phrases we use with kids are actually quite destructive. Despite our good intentions, these statements teach children to stop trusting their internal guidance system, to numb and deny their own emotion, become deceptive.

Here’s a list of the top 5 things to erase from your parenting vocabulary now. Instead, alternatives are provided so that you can replace these habitual statements with phrases that will actually enhance emotional connection and build resiliency.

1. "Don’t cry."
One of the most common statement parents told their kids, especially boys is ‘Don’t cry’. But when we say things like, “Don’t cry,” we’re invalidating their feelings and telling them that their tears are unacceptable. This causes kids to learn to suppress their emotions, which can ultimately lead to more explosive emotional outbursts later. It also confused them as emotion is real and there’s no good or bad emotion. Denying one owns emotion is like denying their sense of hunger or self.

Allow space for your child as he cries. Say things like, “It’s OK to cry. Everyone needs to cry sometimes. I’ll be right here to listen to you.” You might even try verbalizing the feelings your child might be having, “You’re really disappointed that we can’t go to the park right now, huh?” This can help your child understand his feelings and learn to verbalize them sooner than he might otherwise. And by encouraging his emotional expression, you’re helping him learn to regulate his emotions, which is a crucial skill that will serve him throughout life.

2. "It’s nothing, no big deal, everything is OK!"
It’s so easy for adults to belittle and trivialize kid’s feelings. Children often value things that seem small and insignificant to our adult point of view. So, try to see things from your child’s point of view. It may be OK for adult but may not be OK for kids. Acknowledge their feelings, even as you’re setting a boundary or saying no to their request.

“I know you really wanted to do that, but it’s not going to work out for today,” or “I’m sorry you’re disappointed and the answer is no,” are far more respectful than trying to convince your child that their desires don’t really matter.

3. "Why did you do that?"
If your child has done something you don’t like, you certainly do need to have a conversation about it. However, the heat of the moment is not a time when your child can learn from her mistakes. And when you ask a child, “Why?” you’re forcing her to think about and analyze her behavior, which is an advanced skill, even for adults. When confronted with this question, many kids will shut down and get defensive.

Instead, keep the communication line open by guessing what your child might have been feeling and what her underlying needs might be. “Were you feeling frustrated because your friends weren’t listening to your idea?” By attempting to understand what your child was feeling and needing, you might even discover that your own upset about the incident diminishes. “Oh! He bit his friend because he was needing space and feeling scared, and he didn’t know how else to communicate that. He’s not a ‘terror,’ he’s just a kid!”

4. “Stop it right now, or else!”
Threatening a child is never a good idea. First of all, you’re teaching them a skill you don’t really want them to have: the ability to use brute force or superior cunning to get what they want, even when the other person isn’t willing to cooperate. Secondly, you’re putting yourself in an awkward position in which you either have to follow through on your threats—exacting a punishment you threatened in the heat of your anger—or you can back down, teaching your child that your threats are meaningless. Either way, you’re not getting the result you want and you’re damaging your connection with your child.

While it can be difficult to resist the urge to threaten, try sharing vulnerably and redirecting to something more appropriate instead.“It’s NOT OK to hit your brother. I’m worried that he will get hurt, or he’ll hurt you back. If you are really angry, just tell him off or walk away.”

By offering an alternative that is safer yet still allows the child to express her feelings you’re validating her emotions even as you set a clear boundary for her behavior. This will ultimately lead to better self-control and emotional wellbeing for your child.

5. “If you _____ then I’ll give you _____”
Bribing kids is equally destructive as it discourages them from finding inner satisfaction and honour by doing its job properly. This kind of exchange can become a slippery slope and if used frequently, you’re bound to have it come back, expecting more and more. “No! I won’t clean my room unless you buy me Ipad!”

Instead try, “Thank you so much for helping me clean up!” When we offer our genuine gratitude, children are intrinsically motivated to continue to help. And if your child hasn’t been very helpful lately, remind him of a time when he was. “Remember a few months ago when you helped me take out the trash? That was such a big help. Thanks!” Then allow your child to come to the conclusion that helping out is fun and intrinsically rewarding.

It’s crucial for kid’s emotional development and regulation by allowing them to fully express their emotions, whether it is happy, excited, frustrated, sad, angry, upset, or disgusting. Only by learning to recognise and acknowledge their own feelings and teaching them to verbalize it, that they could develop their emotional intelligence.


Wednesday, August 14, 2013

School Vacancies by Phases — Phase 2C Supplementary (as at 14 August 2013)

Phew. We made it... Next step, put on waiting list... for transfer.

Queenstown

SchoolMother TongueTotal VacancyPlaces Taken Up atVacancy for Phase 2C (Supp)No. of Children RegisteredVacancy for Phase 3
ChineseMalayTamilPhase 1Phase 2A1Phase 2A2Phase 2BPhase 2C
New Town Primary SchoolYesYesYes2407501121074534Not available yet*
Queenstown Primary SchoolYesYesYes240680140837516Not available yet*
* Vacancies available for Phase 3 registration will be updated by 28 August 2013, 12noon. This takes into consideration various factors, including the placement of Singapore Citizens/Singapore Permanent Residents children who have yet to secure a place.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

School Vacancies by Phases — Phase 2C Supplementary (as at 13 August 2013)

Dear Parents,
Phase 2C Supplementary registration at the schools will be held from 13 to 14 August 2013. Results will be announced on 20 August 2013.
Parents can still use the Primary One Internet Registration System (P1-IS) to register their child during Phase 2C Supplementary if you are registering your child in any of the 80 P1-IS participating schools with available vacancies in Phase 2C Supplementary. You may do so from 9am on 9 August 2013 to 4.30pm on 13 August 2013.
All our primary schools are well-resourced with good teachers, suitable facilities and sufficient funding for school programmes. They are fully equipped to develop every child to his or her fullest potential, and there are sufficient school places in every region of Singapore to cater to the needs of all Singaporean children.
Should any Singaporean child be unsuccessful during Phase 2C Supplementary, the parents can seek MOE’s assistance to facilitate admission for the child to a primary school with remaining vacancies. This will be done before Phase 3 registration begins.


Clementi

SchoolMother TongueTotal VacancyPlaces Taken Up atVacancy for Phase 2C (Supp)No. of Children Registered
ChineseMalayTamilPhase 1Phase 2A1Phase 2A2Phase 2BPhase 2C
Clementi Primary SchoolYesYesYes2707601971333523
Pei Tong Primary SchoolYesYesYes240680186846434
Qifa Primary SchoolYesYesYes24085019113147




Queenstown

SchoolMother TongueTotal VacancyPlaces Taken Up atVacancy for Phase 2C (Supp)No. of Children Registered
ChineseMalayTamilPhase 1Phase 2A1Phase 2A2Phase 2BPhase 2C
New Town Primary SchoolYesYesYes2407501121074523
Queenstown Primary SchoolYesYesYes24068014083757

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

25 Manners Every Kid Needs by Age 9




School Vacancies by Phases — Phase 2C Supplementary (as at 6 August 2013)

What a disappointing day. We went to the school early for the P1 balloting for children staying within a kilometer, and we did not get the place. Sigh. All surrounding numbers were picked and not our numbers. It's New Town and Queenstown left. I hope they do not need to ballot, as we are definitely two kilometers away.

Queenstown

SchoolMother TongueTotal VacancyPlaces Taken Up atVacancy for Phase 2C (Supp)
ChineseMalayTamilPhase 1Phase 2A1Phase 2A2Phase 2BPhase 2C
New Town Primary SchoolYesYesYes24075011210745
Queenstown Primary SchoolYesYesYes2406901408374

Friday, August 2, 2013

School Vacancies by Phases — Phase 2C (as at 1 August 2013)

Oh! They updated the vacancy, and it's 25 now. Yipee! Higher chances...

Queenstown

SchoolMother TongueTotal VacancyPlaces Taken Up atVacancy* for Phase 2CNo. of Children Registered
ChineseMalayTamilPhase 1Phase 2A1Phase 2A2Phase 2B
Fairfield Methodist School (Primary)YesYesYes2701402759192566
New Town Primary SchoolYesYesYes240750112152107
Queenstown Primary SchoolYesYesYes24069014015784

Fall Classes for Men at the Adult Learning Center

This is amusing...

Note: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of their contents, class sizes will be limited to 8 participants maximum.

How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours
beginning at 7:00 PM.

The Toilet Paper Roll—Does it Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Is it Possible to Urinate Using the Technique of Lifting the Seat and Avoiding the Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?
Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Fundamental Differences between the Laundry Hamper and the Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Dinner Dishes—Can They Levitate and Fly into the Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM

Loss of Identity—Losing the Remote to Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Learning How to Find Things—Starting with Looking in the Right Places and Not Turning the House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Health Watch—Bringing Her Flowers is Not Harmful to Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2
hours.

Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost.
Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Is It Genetically Impossible to Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Learning to Live—Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing.
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM.

How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy—Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going to Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2
hours.

The Stove/Oven—What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.